What relationship?

It's been a crazy couple of days. I've been engaging myself in a past affair. Me and R. I don't know where this is going, we don't talk about it. We have a lot of sexual contact, telling each other how much we love each other.

We can see S is getting upset. It's deja vu all over again. She hates to see me and R getting along so well and kissing, sleeping on each other's beds and interacting like we do. S hides herself in the architecture building a lot, coming out to eat and drink at certain times.

It annoys me to see her upset.

I really do blame her that my relationship with R had gone downhill back in May. She gotta be a damn baby through all this. Her friendship don't mean jack to me whenever I look at her, hear her, I want to smack her. Smack some sense into her.

S couldn't stand letting R love another girl. S only wanted me and R to be friends. Can't she see all the chemistry going on? R tells me, "don't blame S. We're not together because I don't love you enough"

Really? I think that to myself. So now what's happening? Why do you kiss me and hug me like that? Why do you tell me you love me? Do you just mean it like a friend loves a friend?

I feel like a fuckin' piece of meat. It feels shitty.

I'm just ranting/venting.

And i'm a little stressed. It's 7 am right now and I slept for a good 2 hours. I signed myself up for work tonight, that means by day won't end until 8 pm this evening. I still need to study for two upcoming exams next week. Stress... that's it.

I'm doing some major roommate bashing, it's all that rain that's been coming in.